For the last three days I’ve been blanking out every time I get down to writing. There has been so much happening that I could use some ‘venting out’ but doesn’t work nowadays.
I feel this confirms that I am becoming stronger, detached and more independent. I know I am. I am more in control of myself than I ever was in the past. I don't need to write. And it makes me surer about ‘everything happens for the best’.
Good people are still around to listen and help but I’m less needy. I still crib at times but I’m human. I get frustrated but not bitter.
I have been ecstatic about the realisation that I am much more optimistic than I thought I was. In fact, I didn’t even know that I’m an optimist. It’s an incredible feeling.
And I hope I continue with this thing that has started.
...Finally!
11 comments:
Awesome Richa. That's great to know. A stronger person and an optimist. Wow! I could do with that stuff. :)
Though you are less needy now, you've made us needy, of your posts. I've become so habitual of your blogposts, that God forbid, if you start writing less, I don't know what I'd do. I don't even know how many times I've checked your blog in the past three days to see a new post, and when I saw this one, I went - "AHA!".
Whatever happens, keep writing. Please.
Oh and an MF. :)
I hope NOT!
Girl, why? why become detached? Stronger you call it?
In a moment of confusion you decided that being stronger meant holding it it? I guess it's only for me! I somehow believe it is important to let it out or else it kills you from inside! Though we smile but the soul starts to rott and its not a nice thing. CRIB, SHOUT AND SCREAM...don't get used to the ways of the world!
I guess it is your decision yet think about it...Is the world so important that you let go of your innocence?
Swetank
:-)
That's so sweet of you. If not for anything else, I'll keep writing to get such wonderful comments as yours. They make me smile.
And anyway, I don't think I'll stop writing.
Oh and congratulations! :-)
Kanu
Thanks for showing such concern, Kanu. But I think it's high time I got a grip on myself. Attachment has always been a cause of tears for me and now if I think I can do with a little less of it, it will probably be good for me.
And I never meant that I would or have stopped letting it out. I know that it is important to do that.
This post came out of a thought process which is followed by a lot of mess. Life is simple and clear now. I'm happy. For once I am NOT confused. And at the same time, I don't think I am killing anything inside me. I'm just as open to things as I was before. I am not afraid of being in love again, I am not weary of having close friends. I am just more aware of the things that cause hurt on a later date. Like I said, I'm not bitter. And I see nothing wrong in that. I am growing up.
And most importantly, I am not forcing any such feelings. It's happening naturally. I'm just expressing my mind on my blog...like I always do.
The world is important because I am a part of it. I am only losing(I think) a little bit of irrationality.
So please, do not NOT hope. Please.
May the force be with you.
hmm........good to know that.......keep up the spirits :)
That's one of the best things. Superb.
hmmm....
One thing which my friendship has taught me is that the most important thing is to just let it be...And I would say the same thing again here...
If that is the way it is then I shall not Not Hope. Just do what makes you happy girl...and before you get on this bumpy ride of growing up...just one word of advice...Do not forget to enjoy the detours...they are just amazing!
(Detours to the old self!!!)
That is awesome.If you can do away with bitterness for every wrong in your life I am sure every right would be even more appreciated.This new mature confident assured person sounds so cool..:)
Amiya
:-)
Subhadip
Thank you.
DK
Thanks! I'm gonna be trying my best. :-)
Rohit
Yeah, it is.
Kanu
Thanks! :-)
You know, I think most of us are pushed on to this ride. So even though I have always found rides nauseating, I'm trying to make my peace with them now.
Aur detours kya yaar. I cannot live without being my loud,carefree (old) self. I'm cool! :-)
But I really appreciate your comments. I do.
EU
:-)
Thanks so much! SO nice to read this.
Its always good to be an optimist coz then you live longer for like 1 day for each optimistic feeling you experience. I'm an hard core pessimist and even while I'm making this comment, I know you are confused and cursing me for writing something really stupid....or you are abusing me too at the same time...
Hmmmmm......
I have been ecstatic about the realisation that I am much more optimistic than I thought I was.
Anyway...in the end, congratulations!!!
Arz000n
Not confused, not abusing! chill! :-)
Good to see you here.
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