Sunday, March 11, 2007

Mataji

What is a body that has only two lungs functioning, which too are not in a good shape. Nobody knows till when they'll work but everybody knows what will happen. The thought of it is not a trouble considering the age of the body but the sight of it is not tolerable. I don't bloody like it. Why is everything around me hanging in the air? How can things just begin and then not end? I'm sick of saying, 'let's see'. I really am. And in this case, I do not want to see anything more. Ugh!

I don't like hospitals when anyone except me is the patient. I don't like those smells. I don't like those machines. I don't even like needles. Yeah, needles that need 30 minutes to find a vein are no good anyway!
Find veins, find the pulse....I can't believe it man! Can't she be just allowed to go? I don't get those big words. I just know what I see. She's fought with life since I don't know when, and now she's fighting with death. She's always been strange. I don't understand her. Sometimes she looked like she was schizophrenic, and sometimes she was the record book of the entire khandaan with all the latest details.

I remember, she gave me and Nidhi 50 bucks when we learnt the gayatri mantra. 50 bucks was a lot of money back then.
Hmm....

Really don't know what to do or say. Life can be weird.

5 comments:

Kanika said...

"....." Indeed. Sometimes life can not be described in words...and perhaps its best not to...

Ar Ar Ar Arrrrr said...

I hate hospitals too...and during ma last trip to india when dad got cardiac arrest, I used to spend like whole day with him..

I didnt enjoyed it that too in ICU :(

Swetank Gupta said...

Some things just are. Maybe there will come a time when you too can make a difference.

Take care.

Unknown said...

Read this post yesterday too. Not sure what to say. I said it all in my mail I guess. You take care.

Shreya said...

u know...i spent days in a hospital sumtime back, cuz of my granny.....n u have no idea how much i agree with this post...."painful" is nt the word to describe it....